go back to February
I didn't feel well this morning. I had a fever. I had a feeling I shouldn't go to work. But I remembered the complaints in my review, so I went.
I had left a little late, and people were being extremely slow in a group, so I went around them. Then a block ahead of me, an officer stepped into a crosswalk and motioned me to pull over. They got me on radar going 38 in a 25 mph zone. They didn't ask for registration or insurance (both of which I had), just the license and extension. I think they wanted to speed on to the next customer.
I was still only a little late to work. I spent most of the day editing a few .pdf files by editing the Postscript file it printed and converting back. It went a little more smoothly when I figured out the first 35 pages or so are definitions.
Rachel and I made our two favorite Ethiopian dishes from the total four we made before. Unfortunately, they were both very spicey berbere dishes. It was overkill, a bit.
Tomorrow, she is going to make a less spicy dish to balance out the other two.
I woke up once in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat. I had to switch blankets to dry off. My fever had broken, at least temporarily.
I finally had Foreign Affair Honda & Acura service check out the Blue Lion. They said I was very brave to have driven her over 70mph. You should have seen Kevin's face when I told him about the first day I bought her...
Her tires are top priority to replace. Most of her handling problem is from the poorly shaped tires, not the shocks. Also, the tires don't match. Luckily, I can put Akane's tires, wheels and all, on the Blue Lion... one repair I can do myself! The next worst problem is the master cylindar. It has something to do with the breaks, and is leaking fluid.
While they were looking at the Blue Lion, I drove Akane to one last time. She is much scarier to drive. Once I drive her home from Santa Clara, she isn't going anywhere else under her own power. She jerks horribly and makes bad sounds, and I can smell what's left of the lower gears burning.
I was in Santa Clara and didn't want to get stuck in the bad evening southbound commute, so I parked the Blue Lion at the Blue Nile. I had one of the cheaper combos, served on rice instead of injera. It was small and still more than I could finish. There was injera provided on the side to eat with. I've found yet another yummy Ethiopian restaurant.
Now that Akane is going to have bad tires to match her bad transmission, it goes up to $2700 to fix her. She is simply not worth that much, and the sentimental value can be salvaged if I simply salvage the anime paintings, which are conveniently just on the doors. Also, the bucket seats will make cool furniture...
My plans didn't quite work out well today. I was going to take light rail to Santa Clara and drive Akane home. But Gary at work needed to be set up with a laptop, so I figured I would just take the bus to work, then get a ride to Akane with Gary when he went home to Santa Clara.
Gary was late getting in, and late leaving. Finally, after four hours or so at work, I decided to call Linda and Ray to see if one of them could give me a ride, as they live a bit over a mile from my work. Ray said he'd come get me after taking a shower, so I said I'd walk there, and he could find me on the way if he finished before I got there.
Just as I approached their street, I saw his car drive away, behind the market (the only way to turn left onto the major street there). He drove all the way to my office and back. He wasn't very annoyed, and took me to my car. It isn't as bad before it warms up, and made it to the freeway fine. It was fine on the freeway, in the higher gears. The few blocks off the freeway were scary, and I was glad to find a good final parking place.
I picked up Rachel, and we went to the Blue Nile in Santa Clara. We had the vegetarian combination, and it was great! The yellow split peas weren't as pureed as they are at most places, and were more like the ones we recently made.
After I took Rachel home, I switched the tires between the Blue Lion and Akane. It took me a few hours. Afterwords, I got on the freeway to see how fast she would go. I got her up to 90mph. By that time, I was near Tiger's house, so I got off the freeway, got gas (it's cheaper there), and ate at Carrow's. Then I went home around 3am.
I missed church. It wasn't surprising. I was tired.
I got email from my girlfriend asking when her birthday is. The question struck me as funny, even as I remembered helping her pick out a birthday. It's the 25th of this month, by the way. I responded, asking if she wants to do something then. She might want to the weekend after.
Rachel and I went shopping at Target and Whole Foods a good portion of the day.
Truck Spill Jams Freeway.
I don't remember what happened today. It must not have been too important. I do remember the above newspaper headline. It was 1992 I think, and my roommate at the time, Jason Eisenstein, had trouble understanding the headline. He asked me if the truck had spilled jam on the freeway.
I tried to explain that "spill" was a noun in the sentance... it was a spill. But I gave up after trying a little longer.
If you ever really need to break down a door, and it isn't so strong it will hurt you, I recommend it. It is a very liberating experience.
The same roommate I just mentioned, Jason Eisenstein, moved out in November '92, after we tried to kick him out then all decided instead to move away from him. I was at SiliCon the Thanksgiving weekend he moved all of his stuff out of our room and locked the door (to which there was no key).
I came home on a monday morning to get my school books out of our room. I knocked for about a half hour, till Mao Lei opened her door. She said he was gone. I backed up into the living room, broke into a run, and took a flying leap, shoulder-first, into the door. It gave easily, and after the satisfaction of forcibly gaining entry came the mixed feelings that his side of the room was cleaned out, and he was gone.
I slept in a bit. Rachel didn't go to school today, so I dropped by to say goodbye before driving south. Rachel has adopted the outside cat. It is white with grey spots, one on its face. She brought it inside and bathed it, so it no longer smells like pee. I picked it up and decided he is a he.
I called Faith, but they were getting ready to go back to work. Niki wasn't home yet, so I bought five books at Books for Less, which closes for good tomorrow. I paid $6 for the books, including Sybil and When Rabbit Howls.
Niki was home after my shopping spree, and we saw Flubber with her friends Charles and Christina from school. I approve of her new friends, and of the movie. Her friends have been going out for a month and a half, and are still very lovey dovey. The movie was surprisingly entertaining, touching, funny...
I got to my parents' house around midnight.
I woke up and helped Carol go through a big stack of unlabeled video tapes. Then I went home and bathed just in time to visit Patty for a bit before running off to have dinner with David Leary, his mom, and his grandpa at the mall. I got a little lost finding their house, as the neighborhood looks different after eight years.
It was nice catching up with them. Grandpa went home, and the three of us went to see a movie. I mentioned that I'd just seen Dark City and wouldn't mind seeing it again, and they wanted to see it too, so we did.
David's girlfriend had taken their car home, so I took David home. I met his girlfriend, and saw his house. We ended up in a long conversation about multiplicity. We even discussed a mutual friend who used to be multiple (though I had never seen them switch), and he hadn't been sure if they had been multiple, but described a time he was in the car with them when they switched.
I got gas for $.92 a gallon. The cheapest at home is $1.17!
I got in another multiplicity conversation, this time with my mom. She said mp is scary because it isn't normal. She even posed the question, can a part be saved and go to Heaven? I have thought about it before, but have yet to come up with any answers.
Carol and I had lunch in Los Angeles, though it was closer to late afternoon. There is a stretch of Fairfax Avenue with about six Ethiopian restaurants and a market! Unfortuantely, I think the restaurant we went to uses ghee (clarified butter) in their vegetarian food. Carol tried a small bite and gave up. The two dishes that looked interesting had tumeric ("ird" in Ethiopian), which she is allergic to.
I bought an Ethiopian cookbook down the street before we left. She wanted to stop at a clothing store, so we did. She didn't buy anything though, and I found a blue silk shirt.
We said good-bye, and I left after five, in the middle of L.A. traffic. It wasn't too bad, and I met up with Faith at nine at her house. We had dinner while Dan played a video game.
One of our mutual "friends" had called Ace recently and told her that Faith should break up with me, because she isn't "real" and is just going to go away and end up hurting me again. Can you believe that? This friend has never told me any opinion about my seeing Faith, and decides to "help" me by going behind my back and telling Faith (or her host) she should break up with me! I have no idea whether to confront this friend, or what I would say. Arghh!
Faith French braided my hair, and we cuddled and kissed a bit. She kicked me out at 11:30, because she didn't want me driving too late.
I stopped at a rest stop for a few hours, and got home around 4am.
Rachel paged me on the way to work. Her bicycle had acted up on the way to school, and she wanted a ride home. I picked her up for a late lunch, then went to Fry's to buy stuff for work. It took a lot longer than I thought it would, but I should have known Fry's would take longer than I thought.
I talked to Andri online at work. I told her about my friend wanting Faith to break up with me, and she agreed it was a bad thing. I told her about stress at work, and she said she's been taking St. John's Wort, which has calmed her down a lot.
I bought St. John's Wort after work, then took Rachel to a coffee place. We had a few revelations while there.
We have a friend who has an alter who says he is from Heaven, and not from the body he lives in. ("He" is used as a generic term that seems to fit, though the alter is asexual.) I said that there is probably some way in the universe to tell exactly whether he is really from Heaven or just was created by the body to think that, but that it doesn't really matter for us to be able to interact with him. (You don't have to know how a refrigerator works to be able to use it, etc. ...)
I told her about my mom's comments on monday, on whether a part can be saved separately. We discussed whether one would become whole as a part of being saved. I offered that such boundaries may not exist then... might we all be "merged" in some way together? Or, might we be free-floating spirits that can split and touch/combine with others at will?
At the time, this conversation seemed very deep. I will have to look back on it later.
On an impulse, Rachel and I went to Berkeley. We wanted to go eat Ethiopian food at the Blue Nile, hang around, and maybe go to Rocky.
We had good food at the Blue Nile (we think the injera was made with rice flour), and shopped around Telegraph Avenue. We went back to the Blue Nile to get injera, but they don't sell it separately. Rachel bought a snood, a crocheted hair cover thing that stretches and covers your hair in back. Once we were tired and couldn't think of much else to do, we looked at the time. There were still seven hours till midnight, when Rocky Horror started. We headed home and considered making Ethiopian food.
We got gas on the way out of Berkeley for $1.05, and started towards home. However, traffic towards San Jose was really bad. "Want to go to San Francisco?" I asked, looking at the much lighter traffic streaming towards the Bay Bridge. "Sure!"
We decided to get injera at an Ethiopian restaurant there. We drove around looking for a place to park and look one up. This took a while. We called them and got directions, which we somehow were unable to follow. We bought a map, got lost some more, and finally found it. The injera was small (standard plate-sized), and a dollar instead of 75 cents. The place is called Nyala, and it has a buffet. I want to actually eat there sometime.
Then all we had to do was get back to the freeway and head home. After half an hour to an hour, with a map, we found the freeway. It was pretty easy after that. Interestingly enough, we never even touched Market street.
I served Ethiopian food at work today! People liked it! I ate a lot of it while showing people how to eat it. Mary asked: "So, you cooked food for us?" I said yes, and she said "cool!"
I got on Sanctuary in the morning, and left lots of supportive notes and posts. Maybe I had the feeling I would be needing support soon myself.
I called Ace. She said she was having the car fixed, and thought she'd be home around noon. She also told me about something else.
The "friend" I mentioned on the 16th, who told Faith to break up with me, is Carol. Ace had told her that I was coming to visit, and Carol had asked if Ace was going to "break it off." Ace said that was between Todd and his girlfriend, at which point Carol had gotten snippy.
For some reason, I wasn't too happy with Carol. We left.
When we got to Arroyo Grande, we called Ace's house, but she wasn't back yet, so we went on to Santa Maria. We went to the shopping center where Niki works, but she wasn't off work yet, so we browsed a pet store and Long's.
I tried to call Carol at home, but I just got the answering machine. I said I wanted to talk to her. I could feel adrenaline pumping as I called, knowing there was a confrontation coming. We window shopped some more, and I tried to call Ace again. She wasn't home yet, but Dan had a message from Carol to call her in Los Osos. I did, and I asked her what she thinks of my relationship with Faith.
There was a long pause. I overheard Carol talking with Andrew. Then Andrew got on the phone. Andrew told me that Ace is trying to integrate, that Dan is getting annoyed by my calling for Faith, that Ace and Dan were getting serious in their relationship, that Ace's mental health was the real issue here, and that it would be best for all involved if I treat Faith as dead.
I told Andrew I would have a talk with Ace. He said that would probably be best. The tone of his voice seemed to say, I know what's best for you.
Niki got off work, and we took her out for sushi at Atari-ya. I was still chewing over what Andrew had said. I couldn't put away the remote possibility that it had any root in truth. Ace had merged before, but the way she had talked that morning, it didn't seem like she was currently trying to.
We went back to Niki's house and watched Princess Bride. There was a message from Carol at Ace's house. I paged them. Carol told me that I should come visit, because Ace was upset about the car.
I figured something out that simplified my emotions a bit. Even if everything from Carol and Andrew turned out to be true, I was still mad at Carol. I had been trying to figure out what to feel, and that made me feel much better.
After the movie, Rachel and I went to Ace's house. I got lost trying to find her trailer without Priscilla in front of it, but we finally called and got the space number. We showed up close to midnight.
Ace had been drinking, and told us about Priscilla. While they were looking at her, the exhaust manifold cracked, and flames came out. She wasn't very happy, and I didn't feel it was a good time to bring up what I was worried about. Ace went to bed, and we finally left. Andrew shook my hand, and I was glad he didn't try to hug me. I don't think I would have let him.
We drove right home, except for a 15 minute nap at a rest stop. We got to Rachel's house at four something and slept.
I found Suzanne's address, and emailed her. I said I thought she was someone familiar, and if not, I was sorry for the intrusion. I wasn't sure it was the right address, and thought she might not want to talk to me. After all, I remembered that on September 3, Carol had said hi to her for me, and that Suzanne hadn't said anything.
Well, it was her, and she was glad to hear from me! We sent several emails back and forth, and it turns out Suzanne had asked Carol about me. She'd been told that I still thought Suzanne had ruined my life. If I was still going on about that after we'd broken up over 3 years ago, then she didn't want to talk to me.
Of course I don't think she ruined my life. She enriched my life! And she told me she would have responded with something, at least a bitchy comment, even if she'd been mad.
I got email from Ace. Everything about integration and Dan being annoyed was untrue.
They let someone go at work today, and wanted me to back up his data before they told him. I considered it might be an early April Fools prank on me, but it wasn't.
Rachel and I went to Cafe Leviticus after work for coffee. I actually drank a quad soy mocha (complete with caffeine). I tried to call Carol, but she wasn't home.
I tried again when I got home, left a message, and paged her, but didn't reach her.
go on to April